As the Suicidal Thoughts Engulfed Me, I prayed to Mary…
Almost instantly, they vanished.
Like shadows under a flashlight - gone.
Normally they are creeping, crawling, ever so pervasively into the back of your mind until it’s overwhelming - what!? Why? How did we get here?? You are reeling.
Those thoughts sound like, “What if I Did it like this…” “What about like that…?” “Would they miss me?” “That’ll show them…”
These thoughts are demonic in nature, stemming from the 7 deadly sins, but moreso the emotions that can build up if left unchecked: sadness, revenge, shame…
I urge you, in this spiritual battle to find solemnity in prayer. There is strength in prayer. There is more to our physical world than we can fathom. Science can only explain so much.
As I search for answers to why I am the way I am, Bipolar, maybe it is Demonic in nature, but maybe its explainable through brain chemicals. Maybe there will be a test one day, one better than just a checklist.
Until the, until we can we can reach a conclusion. Let us Pray.
