Four Quick Reasons I’m Glad I Got Back on an Anti-Depressant
If you’re struggling with admitting you have or struggle with depression, you aren’t alone. I fought it both times, even he second time! I had already known I was depressed before! but I fought it for even longer (5 years!) so suffice to say, this is something I have a little anecdotal authority over. For now, I would like to share the common experience I had each time began taking antidepressant and it me recognize that I was indeed depressed.
I came off my Cymbalta around 2015 or 2016. I actually felt like I did good for a bit, working closely with my doctor. I wasn’t diagnosed with Bipolar back then either though. It wasn’t until I started my first LLC and started driving Lyft and Uber to help fund the startup. This was what wreaked havoc on my mental state and sent me SPIRALLING back towards depression. I’ll cover the details and anthology of that epoch in my life on another post. But for now I want to share the common thread of what happened each time I started an anti-depressant and how it helped me realize I actually was depressed.
#1) My focus is better
As soon as you take your first dosage of an SSRI, it starts working. It takes anywhere from 2-6 weeks to become fully effective. So even though I’m on my 4th day - I can already feel my clarity increasing. I can have an idea and hold that thought for much, much longer. My diligence feels more resolved. I feel re-invigorated to get back on track for old goals. And finally - I can literally focus on my thoughts and interactions and control myself better, control my positivity better and all around be better.
#2) Texting is less stressful
All of sudden every text message I was reading suddenly felt positive, or simply neutral. My Wife saying, “sorry. really busy at work” in the midst of a string of short text responses regarding dinner didn’t feel dismissive, just plainly informative. Or otherwise, they didn’t seem to have any negative edge to them, they were even positive, cheerful feeling. It was a massive realization and made me wish I had been on them sooner
#3) The Sun is Sunnier
yes, its not the first time I’ve noticed this when going on an SNRI. You don’t realize how dull the world is, how dim, and shadowy it is until the serotonin starts flooding back, the world actually gets brighter. It’s hard to explain, but the sun feels like an LED when your depressed, but not when you start to feel normal again. Not just the sun that gets brighter, but your disposition as well.
#4) My Workouts Got Better
I noticed it most especially this morning during my training regiment with my personal trainer. We meet once a week. I highly recommend it. It was always a way to keep me accountable especially after having the kiddos. But also to force myself to workout because exercise cures depression they say.
But if it’s a true chemical imbalance then no amount of healthy eating or exercise will help. Yesterday’s workout was the longest I’ve had energy to workout in a while and today, ma, I just felt so pumped, energize, happy to be in the gym - almost like I used to when I was in my stride.
That’s really it for now, jus a few days in and I am hopeful. I will see about revisiting this after 3 or 4 more weeks to see how the Sertraline is really doing to help out and if it’s helped my relationship, career, and more!
